Sometimes, it’s inordinately hard to push on.
No matter what you do, the world seems to push back.
Life does get hard from time to time. There are days when everything seems so undoable, every obstacle so unsurmountable. Every situation so non-negotiable.
I am facing similar situations right now. Several such situations.
People aren’t co-operating. Nervousness is racking up. The precision of campaigns is dwindling. Incomes are likely to dry up soon. Expenses are likely to increase.
And sure, I do have buffers. I have several months of expenses in savings. Actually, a couple of years. I have support systems to fall back on. A great family to be with no matter what goes wrong. Several opportunities to fight back and grow again should I fail in the near future.
Yet none of that seems to deter nervousness from setting in.
Every move counts. True or false. Especially false. Every mistake can be catastrophic.
I need to balance speed and accuracy. I need to work harder than I’ve ever worked before. There are people relying on my ability to execute my plans and generate results.
Even though I can only execute a plan, and that does not necessarily guarantee generation of any kinds of results, even the execution of the plan is contingent upon unfailing regularity and dedication.
The kind that I have honestly not exhibited in quite a while now.
Perhaps the root cause of my nervousness is my fear of not being as dedicated and regular as my own plan requires of me.
Sure the odds are stacked against me, as they have always been, and they’ll always be… any strategy that relies excessively upon one person, or one individual component to perform regularly and flawlessly is an inherently flawed strategy.
And the one I’m about to execute relies not just excessively but almost exclusively on me.
If I work the system and execute well, and it still doesn’t bring the results I expect, I’ll live. I’ll move on to another plan.
But if I fail to work the system the way it’s planned… then I don’t think there’s going to be much forgiveness for me. I’ll only have myself to blame, and that’s what scares the s*** out of me.
One year from now, I might look back and laugh at the idea of having been so nervous. But this is how it is right now.
Big or small, successful or unsuccessful… we all fear failure. Even when there are (multiple) safety nets.
Modern life is so damn stressful simply because we live in a world that’s too comfortable. There aren’t very many need-based problems to solve. In fact, if everybody bought just what they need, the GDP would be 2% of what it is. Maybe 5%, but no more than that.
So essentially a lot of the modern day commerce is meaningless, and there are few to none absolute win-win scenarios here. Largely, it’s a question of transfer of wealth. And everyone wants to be on the receiving end.
If nothing else, at least I can hope to be able to say I have a win-win plan for all parties involved.